just some scattered shit passing through

have you ever, just once, think about the past? maybe just for a few minutes? yup. been there, done that.

a few times thinking about high school days. the fun we had, the stories we shared, and the experiences we had those days. i miss those days. and now, looking at the present time. and what do we got now? all of us got busy. we all have our own stuffs and activities to do, we got our new friends, and yes, some of us changed, physically or even our personalities. 

me too, i got busy, i changed too. but still can't keep my mind away from all the memories with you buddies out there. 

and you out there, a few times you run around my mind. i don't miss you, i'm just wondering about how you're doing out there. 

Afraid of what changes will change us

We lately discussed about our meetings. i know that we met up a lot. like, literally a lot. and i know that sometimes you feel like you've had enough. well, i'm just letting you know that we, girls, have a different perspective than guys. i guess we're just afraid of losing you. you know what i mean? like these days, billions of more attractive girls, more to be known as single attractive girls, are out there. and well yeah for us girls, we're so much afraid of losing you.
it may have sounded a lil bit crazy, but i like seeing you all day. it doesn't mean that i gotta see you face to face everyday, it's just that i'm comfortable of seeing you and i always have the feeling that i have someone who truly cares for me, for who i am.
but sometimes, you guys, just don't even understand our thoughts. like hello.... gue gakpernah jenuh ketemu sama lo 
I'm afraid that your friends, new friends, new working environment, change the way you think.

i'm okay with you hangin' out with your buds. i'm okay with that, seriously. all i'm asking is that you make your own portion of meeting me and your friends.

you know what? even words can't put up about what my mind has been thinking lately.

really. i'm tired of hoping for everything. everything's just the same.

waktu

hi!

gila ya udah kuliah aja gua. gak kerasa banget cpt banget waktu berlalu.
kangen sma sih, seru2nya, temen2nya. gimana juga kuliah msh blm bisa gantiin itu semua. maybe soon it will but i seriously doubt it.

apa yg ada diotak gua ttg sma cuman 1:

Sahabat dr dalem hati

kerasa banget kan skrg kuliah semua serba individual? dmn semua yg tdnya itu adlh temen lu, skrg mrk semua kompetitor lu buat di dunia kerja ntr. kejar2an IP, dan mereka bodo amat sama org lain
nyari sahabat di kuliah susah nyet, ada yg mau jd sahabat demi nilai mereka biar bagus.

kuliah = awal dr realita depan mata

gua coba enjoy2 aja kuliah.

tp gimana pun juga sma tetep yg paling top dah

hm.

 so today's supposed to be another special day for me. well...... i was wishing for something special to happen. tapi yaa gimana kok gua malah ribut sama dia. cuman masalah kecil doang loh

it's only about how much money he'll get disaat dia pindah ke bandung. well, kt punya opini masing2 kan, cuman somehow like he can't accept my opinion gitu. 

and stuffs like this happens a lot. like literally a lot. 

capek? iya sih, cuman gimana? yaa gua udah sayang sm dia, masalah kecil kaya gitu aja gakblh bikin gua down, no matter what. 
gua tau dia orgnya gimana. moody, but amazing. tp gimana ya..... u understand that in some moments u have this "tired of everything" moments, aight? 

ya gua capek aja gitu ya. he's about to move to bandung, leaving me, and all i have in my memory is all the fight we've had these days. it's simply not the kind of memory i wanna have in my mind about him.... 
oh yea u shud know. dia kl bercanda2an suka bls bbm suka pendek2 kan. well... gua gaksuka, cuman i'm not gonna talk about that to him. i don't wanna start an argument 3-( gua juga pengen loh diperhatiin, pengen dia nanya gua sesuatu yg bikin gua senyum lah, yg bikin gua bnr2 special dimata dia. 
cuman kok kayanya kebanyakan gua yg nanyain ke dia "lg apa" dll ataupun gua cerita2 ttg hidup gua misalnya kaya "i was just eating pork dumplings loh" and he responded something like this "oh" or maybe "ok". 
hey u, u shud know that i'm literally tired. exhausted. wishing that u would care more to me, even it's only for a tiny bit, i'll smile. 
well i'm sorry but these days, it's just hard for me to smile when i think of you karena apa yg ada di otak gua ttg lo cuman berantem, lo jwb bbm gue pendek2, lo kurang bs perhatiin gua...yeah and stuffs lah banyak.

capek loh
ya cukup tau aja sih, i got no one to talk to about this so i'm literally putting this in my blog he he 

EXPRESSSSSSSSSS

You guys know what's expressions looks like, eh? you know, the faces and sounds you made for something that makes you happy or.....yea sad.

BUT NO. this time i'm about to show you an expression................................

OF HAPPINESSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!



IWEUHIUDCNQOIUWEHCMERUHCFMIWHERCFWEIURHCFMWIERHCFMIERHBFCUWEHRBCMWIREHFCWIERHFCMUERHFWBOEJHNVOUHFVNOIEUHFVIUEVBIEJVNIOWUEBVIWJERBVIUEBVPWIEFHVIPUEVIPUENVIEUBGIJNEVIUEBVPOEJBHIPUNFPIBUSGBSIJDBGIPSUJNBPIUSBKSDJFBISUDJFNBISPDUFBSIDJFNBISUDBFISJDFNBIUSDBFSJDKFBUISDFBISDJFBSDFB


GOSH! DOING THIS IS SOOOO AMAZING!!!!!

IWENCIUENRCIUEBNIUARNVAIURNVURKAIURVNJDAOIUDRVAJRYIAUSRBUAIJRBIOUVBHSBAIOUBRIVAUBRVIAUSBVIASUBVUVIBAISURBVIUSBRVIAUSBRVIAURBVIAURBIVAUBRIVUABRIVUBAVIUBAIUSBRIVAUBRSUVBIOAIURBVUIRAOIURBVUABSVOIAURBVAIURBVIAURBVIAUSBRVIAURBVIAURBVIAURBVIAUBRVIAURBVAIURBVIAUBVIURBVIAURBVAIURBV


doing those stuffs, soothes me HA-_-

well, guess why. National Exam's over, dude!!!! i mean like, YEAH, WATCH DVDS TILL YOU DROP YOUR EYES, EAT TILL YOU PUKE, SLEEP TILL YOU DROP, SHIT TILL YOU DIE, PEE TILL YOU'RE DRUNK. Whatever

all i'm telling you is that freedom is delicious. freedom is awesome. freedom is amazing in a thousand words. BUT IN A GOOD WAY FREEDOM



CHEEEEERRRRSSSSSSSSSSSS

XIIS1

the one class that'll accompany me spend the days in 12th grade.

YUP. this is a very very special class. why? well, i guess some of you know some about it, but yeah since this is my blog, i'm gonna tell you some about this class.

AT FIRST i felt bored for having in the same class with the seminariums. and here goes the BUT. BUT, i turned out wrong. i thought they'll be boring and stuffs. well, it's a big no. seriously, i love my class. i can't simply replace any of them in my heart.

SOOOOO here are the guys and the girls in my class...........

1. Adityo Kresno Nugeroho-->Diro



2. Adrianus Charles Jackson-->Jack

v]

3. Alexander Glen-->Gentha



4. Anastasia Nirmala-->Tasya



She's on the left side

5. Anicetus Anindito-->Dito



6. Arnoldus Kristianus-->Akri



7. Chandra Ruswidyawan-->Chandra



8. Christoper Samiaji Dewanto-->Dewa



9. Diandra Sumendap-->Diandra



10. Elizabeth Venta-->Venta



11. Gabriella Vania-->Vania



12. Gerard Joshua Kawun-->Gerard



13. Grandis Sheila Tanjung-->Brendy



14. Jennifer Wiraya-->Jennifer



She's on the left side

15. Jhonni Andreas Sinaga-->Jonas



16. Johannes Wahyu-->Yudi



17. Johannes Leonardus Hartantyo-->Tantyo



18. Joseph Marandhika Ardhianto-->Joseph



19. Leon Nouval Lolang-->Leon



20. Maria Benadicta-->Dicta



21. Marsel Dimas-->Dwi



he's on the left side of the pic

22. Natalia Elisa-->Nata



23. Renatta Moeloek-->Rena



24. Putri Anindita-->Nindy



25. Rachael Abigail-->Gabby



26. Robertus Radinal-->Bento

Sorry, no pic-_- didn't find any of his pic

27. Stanislaus Krisha-->Krisha



28. Stevanus Jordy-->Jordy



He's on the very left side

29. Tatjana Dabita-->Dabita



30. Thomas Aquinas Dewaranu-->Denas



31. Yohanes Eureca-->Yoka



32. Yohanes Gema Kumara-->Gema



33. Yosephine Felica Dagna-->Dagna





Yes. There they are. The one who can make me smile, laugh, and having the best times of my life.

Another simple word i can describe about my class? it'll be "Loca" for being crazy. together. :)

High school
. Yes. The most complicated time of your teenage life. I guess. Moments like this, you may need a good friend. Not just a good friend, a friend who listens to you, ready to borrow their shoulder to cry on. High school for me, is a place to play, where I share my most awesome moments with those whom I love. Being 17 is the part where I'm trying to find my self-identity. Searching and searching until you find the best one that describes you.

A FRIEND. Or I may say, friends. These specific humans are meant to help you find your self identity. They either will go out with you and share thoughts that could simply change the way you see things in this world. Me, I have found lots of friends here in my high school. Different kinds of friends helped me to see and feel things in a different way.

BEST MATES. I have found them. To who I can share stories? Them. To whom I can cry? Them. In life, I tried to find good things from each of my mates. And from all that, I try to make conclusions out of it. Well, for some examples:
-->E. EDLYN VANIA. She was like a cloning of me. Why? We both have the same perspective of seeing things in this world. She taught me how to love people, how to respect them, how to not see people from the negative side.
-->GRANDIS SHEILA T. Well I guess, I knew a lot more about lovelife from her. I learned that there's no such thing as a "forever love" in life. Her journey of life takes me to tunnel where I stand there alone, and I know that no one can back you up someday in the future.
-->MARIO P. H. GULTOM. Even though he's a quite type of person, he shares a lot of his life lessons. Being patient and loyal is the best part of his life lessons that I can conclude from him. He gave me thoughts of seeing people from the good side first. He kept reminding me to thank God all the time.
-->RADITYA JOKO B. Him? He's the kind of mate I would keep for years and years of my life. He taught me about how we should enjoy our lives, how we should respect our partner. Sometimes, I think that he's some kind of angel from earth.

But most of all,
-->JURANDRA RADITIA. A beautiful and precious boyfriend that God gave me. I was a very closed person, where I never try to speak up my mind. Him, in my life, is a miracle. He opened up my mind and helped me to control the world in my hands. He thought me about love. A love that I simply will never forget. He's my love-life and also my bestfriend.

See? High school is complicated. When you can't find a good friend for yourself, well it'll be hard to learn more about life. Being me myself is the best potion in the world. I don't care if someone acts as someone they're not. I am me. My self. Dicta. And I know, I am capable of doing things beyond my imagination, thanks to my friends, my best mates, my mom and dad, and a lovely boyfriend ever.





"Yang lain bersandiwara, gue apa adanya"
-A Mild

from this to that, can you imagine?!

IMAGINE!


your best friend becomes your boyfriend :)
i mean like.......wow! unbelievable!

JURANDRA RADITIA :) 10022011

my buddies part 2!

And here are the last 4 names of my buddies!

6. EDLYN VANIA
elin? she's totally fun. we used to hang out together every breaktime. we share stories, we help each other solving problems. i love to play with her cause sh helped me with lots of thing and all i want is to have my friends just like her :)

7. JURANDRA RADITIA
HE'S JUST SOOOO FUNNY! everytime i'm sad or like kinda desperate, he always help me cheering up myself. i trust him and i like sharing stories with him cause i can always count on him and i can always feel comfortable with him and my other buddies. sometimes, we have this "galau" moment and we listen to songs. that's awesome! seriously!

8. JOSEPH MARANDHIKA ARDHIANTO
He's my jazz buddy. me and him often watching jazz every friday night at Teras Kota BSD. we share our favorite jazz bands and we even have our own band with Brendy! he's a very nice guy and he's an easy going kinda guy. having him as one of my best bud is one of the best thing in my life

9. BENEDICTUS JOSEF RADITYA JOKO BRAMANTYO
HE'S A REAAAAL BASS MANIAC! i can always and will forever be counting on him. i tell all of stories to him and he gives me good advices! i like watching him slappin' the bass. he turns into this "monster of bass" everytime he touches the bass or plays it. he's a totally nice guy!

YUP!!! That's them! i love 'em!

my buddies part 1

Hey again blogspot! i'm back again this october! okay, so this post right here is about my best buddies, which they taught me lots and lots of things in my life. each of them have their own unique characteristics. each one of them have the same favorite thing like i do. yeah, too much talking. so let's continue this thaaang!!!

i give you 5 names of my buddies, starting from number:


1.MARIA ANDISA MAYANGSARI
She's a very good friend of mine, i like talking with her. she has this good sense of humor, and she gives me good advices when i told her my stories. she's also a very tough young lady.

2. ANASTASYA BHIROWO
i can always count on her. she's a very very nice and a great friend to share with. she taught me how to be honest to each other, try to say everything we feel rather than letting it stuck in your mind. she's also funny! she's like....totally hilarious

3. GITTA ASTARI
i do know that she's totally nuts HAHA just kidding, Git! we like to share stories. she helps me cheering up my life. she also taught me that this world is fun and enjoy it.

4. GRANDIS SHEILA TANJUNG
I call her Brendy. she's crazy! she's fun! we now have the same lovelife story. we have this funny same hobby, and that is........go to the toilet at school! i mean like...that's totally weird. but it's totally fun ;)

5. ANZELMA KARIN ULI
she's an old pal since....7th grade. we used to have this soccer organization called DFO. I like sharing stories with her because she gives me funny responses. she's also a fun and positive person, and it taught me too


sorry but i'll continue the others later. it's midnight now, so i gotta go to bed. see you guys!

errr what's this

heyaaaaa blogspot! it's been a long gua gak ngepost. gua kangen banget sama lu gile, satu satunya tempat curhat yang gak bakal komentar......beuh mantep. tau ah lg stress ini. ohiya gua putus sama dika. pertengahan agustus gitu. gua berterimakasih banget sama dia karena dia udah memberika gua banyak pelajaran berharga dalam hidup gua. thanks a looot for the stupid funny and extraordinary 5 months, dik :)

okeeh mau ngomong apa ya gua tadi? HMMM OHIYA! Guess what guys! i have a band now! eeeeyy saya senang sekali uauaua nama band gua itu Albatros loooh hahaha gua jadi vokalis, terus gitarisnya itu Adam sama Bian. bassistnya si Andra terus drummernya si galau man yaitu *jengjeng* Andrew!!!! so we're a rock band! our first performance will be at Gonzaga Performance Night di sekolah gua, Kolese Gonzaga. nonton yee, kagak mahal kok! hahaha!

well hmmm

sedikit cerita2 aja sih ya, kenapa akhir2 ini banyak banget remaja yang galau? (termasuk saya). mungkin itu adalah suatu perasaan yang gak jelas di kalangan kita semua. cuman apakah sebenarnya arti dari galau itu? karena gua sendiri udah paham apa itu galau cuman ada beberapa orang yang mendefinisikannya salah. gua liatin banyak banget orang galau di twitter. pagi kek, siang kek, malem, and so on and so on. masih muter2 aja diotak gua, kenapa ada galau di dunia ini? gak enak banget rasanya. emo emo kaya tele gitu YEA -_-

yaaaaah sekedar mau cerita2 doang sih, emak gua udah manggil manggil, mau nonton jazz katanya haha oke dah selesein tugas dulu, i'll see you guys someday when i have the time to post something here! byeeeeeee :)

pathetic, ordinary

I feel like I'm pathetic, feel like I'm totally ordinary. I feel like I'm boring. Feel like I'm so quite till I make people bored. Whatever, I'm tired. I need rest. I need sleep. Bye

CAN'T WAIT!

YEEEEES! Finally the day i've been waiting for is coming! Dityo's coming hoooome! gile ya bener deh sumpreeet seneng gua, banyak curhatan nih dit! cuman sayangnya gua tanggal 30 Juni lg gak di Jakarta nih diiit! gua balik baru tanggal 2, pkknya lu gakblh ke semarang dulu sebelom gua balik HAHAH maksa gua

okay

jd sebenrnya intinya aja sih ya, gua seneng banget kalo gua pny temen yg jauh gak tinggal disini terus balik gt kan, gua suka seneng2 sendiri kaya org gila. okay maybe i'm a little too over, but seriously, that's how i feel.

maybe kinda awkward

maybe not

okay whatever, go back to the main topic

so.......gua dr tanggal 28-2 ntar mau ke karimun jawa jalan2. seru juga sih, masalahnya gua belom pernah kesana makanya bakal jd pengalaman banget. katanya mau nginep di wisma apung, maybe. i'm not sure yet hahaha

OH MY GOD! Ovj's on the play! okay gotta go guys! see ya later, alligatorssssss :p toodle

HELL YEAH EXAMS' DONE!

heyya blogspot! seriously, it felt like years since the last time i posted. so i'm done with those fcking exams! finally my brain could take a rest for a while hahaha! so here's the thing, tomorrow's my 4th month anniversary with my boyfie and damn it i almost forgot. well that's it HAHA not important huh?

by the way, this blog is the place for me to show you my feelings to you guys. so lately.....i'm feeling kinda gloomy, i dont know why, but i think i do know the reason why hahaha okay, i'm bored. bye

it's just something not that important

well, hey there guys. so, it's still the starting month of April, huh? i guess time goes by so fast. less than a month, school's gonna have another test. something that's totally freakin' the hell out of me and my friends. OH YEAH, i'm gonna stop being such a negative kinda person, 'cause that totally sucks, dude. gotta learn from the past!

And, OH YEAH! i just watched How to train your dragon and the movie was....fuckingly cool! it's like..totally awesome. Toothless was soooo cute! i mean like, super cute. seriously, gotta love that movie.
and last thing before i end up my posting, i just wanna say I LOVE MY LIFE! hahaha i know what i just said is so pointless to you, but that's the way i am. express yourself, dont just keep it for yourself.
well, okay. that's it. enough. bye, see you guys on my next post!

2 MONTHS!

HAPPY 2 MONTHS BONAVENTURA GEMA ANDIKA SATRIA!! LUP YOUCHHH

good luck to gonz #21

Good luck guys on your UAN!!!! I'm gonna pray for you guys, and wishing you guys luck! Especially to my Bonaventura Gema Andika, good luck dear, I will always pray for you so you can do your test well! I know I'm gonna be far away for 4 days, but still don't worry, I'm gonna be there for you. Wish you luck, loveyouu! And once again, wish you guys the best, Gonz #21! Keep up your spirit guys, I know you can do it!

Well okay, see ya later guys, I gotta go. Me and my fam are going to have a walk sumwhere I don't know hahaha hmm okay then, see ya guys later! Write to ya soon! Byebye!!!!

webcam with Dityo

it's been a very very very very long time i didnt see him. finally, i'm now webcam-ing with him hahaha so many stories to tell. he still looks the same as he used to the last time i saw him, still crazy and nutsy hahah kidding bro! okay, i'll post again later. see ya guys, bye. and yeah, so you on my next post!

Rain Falls Down - We The Kings

I'm only sure one thing
That's you right now
I hear your voice and what we talk about
And I'm trying to say what won't come out
Yeah, I'm trying to fix what's broken now

And I'm wishing that I could take your hand
And set you on some untouched land
Just so you are never sad again
And the world you've known will somehow end

There's a beating to your heart
That I just can't be apart

I can feel the rain fall down on us together
Just wait for the sunshine
Let's wait for the new day
When we can get away
It's me and you held close together
Hold on for the long ride
This won't be easy
Tonight

Hear my voice and know that I am here
I'm always there to wipe away your tears
I lay your hair behind your gentle ear
And tell you there is nothing more to fear

You are the reason I am the best I'll be
So let me stitch your heart so it won't bleed
And I won't rest until you finally breathe
'Cause I still love you more than anything

There's a beating to your heart
That I just can't be apart

I can feel the rain fall down on us together
Just wait for the sunshine
Let's wait for the new day
When we can get away
It's me and you held close together
Hold on for the long ride
This won't be easy
Tonight

I can feel the rain fall down
I can see the clouds leaving town
I can tell your life's turned around
And I can hear you singing so loud now

I can feel the rain fall down on us together
Just wait for the sunshine
Let's wait for the new day
When we can get away
It's me and you held close together
Hold on for the long ride
This won't be easy
Tonight
This won't be easy
Tonight

-i simply love the lyrics, just dont know why

BYE DITYO! SEE YOU SOON!

AAAAAAAAAARGH! Besok Dityo berangkat ke Aussie! tomorrow's gonna be the last day i'll see him!

Well, i just wanna say...THANKS BANGET DIT SELAMA LO DI INDONESIA UDAH MAU DENGERIN CURHAT2AN GUA YG TOLOL DAN GAK PENTING ITU!!! Dr jaman kelas 9 lu udah bantuin gua wkt itu sama si itu, trs lu juga jd pusat curhatan gua di SMA. Gak akan deh gua ngelupain lo dit!!! Thanks banget ya, Raditya Joko Bramantyo udah jd temen baik plus "cousin" gua. Balik2 dr Aussie jangan sombong2 sama gua ya!










I'LL MISS YOU DITSSSSS!!!!! JANGAN LUPA SAMA GUA YA!!!!